Bronson Maijala – Drummer

A hangover can be cured with a loaf of French bread. It’s $1.50 and supplies you with enough carbs to hide from the IRS. Most importantly, bread keeps you constipated. Constipation is key to an Artist’s survival. Nutrition must be stored for as long as possible…

Cookie dough is a healthy substitute for food. It’s got everything but fruit. Plus, you get full pretty quickly.You can eat two pieces of cookie dough for breakfast everyday, which should last you 12 working days. At $2.50 a package, that’s less than a quarter a day, and it’s healthy. It also makes you sh** black lava, which is pretty cool. By the way, sh***ing black lava is normal. It’s your body’s way of maintaining homeostasis…

Vodka is a great way to stay healthy without hurting your pocket. It’s about $4.00 a gallon and they all taste the same. You sleep like a baby, sweat out toxins, and lose weight. It’s like a gym in a bottle.

Bronson Maijala, Los Angeles – Drummer

(Do you have a fun, funny, intriguing, adventurous, or life changing story to tell about your adventures as an artist? It can be about food, shelter, clothes, or living in general. Please send your story in an email to Also include some pictures and contact information.)

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One Response to Bronson Maijala – Drummer

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